Small but awesome update...we are still in the running, and it is down to us and one other family -- WAHOO!!

If you could do me a favor, in the words of my amazing friend Dianne, "lift up a thought, pray, yell, meditation - anything!" -- for Jeremy and I as we wait patiently (mostly) -- for our wonderful families and friends as they wait to become one person larger -- for little baby J as he waits for his family situation to work itself out -- and especially for his mom, C as she makes the most difficult decision of young life. And hell, while you're at it, throw in a word for Spring, because I am sick of this damned snow!!!

Much love to all of you!!

A little post to update you guys on our newest situation...Mom made some cuts over the weekend and we are still in the running. I don't know how many families are still in the running with us...probably 3 or 4. So we're still waiting patiently (mostly LOL) and we hope to hear more tomorrow.

I know the right thing will be done here; even if this little one isn't meant to be our son, he will have a loving, wonderful family when this is all said and done whether Mom decides to place or parent. I did some major soul searching this weekend because I was feeling possessive of this little guy and I reminded myself that I don't want just any baby, I want ours. I want the child who is meant for our family, and I don't want anyone else's baby. I need to remember that this is not in Jeremy's and my control. All of your loving thoughts and prayers have been and will continue to be appreciated and felt, thank you!!

Not a baby related blog today...just a hey howyadoin blog. It was a fun weekend - Jeremy and I went out for Thai food on Friday night as a late Valentine's Day dinner. We really like this restaurant; it's just a little hole in the wall place-nothing special from the outside but the food is really good!

Saturday, I went to breakfast with my friend Annie and had a great chat with her...then we went shopping. If you know either of us, you know that we are marathoners and we both excel at shopping :) It was a quick trip to Carson's to look at baby clothes - I needed a gift, and while we were there, I found the cutest little Adidas tracksuit on the clearance rack...and for $7.50, I couldn't pass it up...especially since it was my favorite color (orange!).

After we were done with our little jaunt, I went to pick Jeremy's wool coat up at the cleaners and went home to "help" him pack. I mostly veto/approve shirts. I took him to the airport at 5 and came home to wait for Michelle to come over for our sleepover evening of piggery and talk. We had pizza, chocolates and cupcakes...delish! Sunday we went to the outlet mall where I got two very cool things that don't go together whatsoever! I found the cutest red, platform, peep-toe slingbacks with red bows on the toes. They are almost cartoony in their retro-goodness...I fell in love with them even before I noticed that they were clearance priced...at $7.25. I bought them so fast I think I saw my credit card smoking.

Then we went to a wonderful children's store called Strasburg. Here's a link to the store so you can bask in the beauty that is their clothing selection.
http://www.strasburgchildren.com/index.html
These are the kind of clothes that you really don't want your children moving in. They'd be great for portraits - but God forbid your child would want to eat or play in them, because they are works of art...and expensive like works of art! So we walked around the store and oohed and ahhed over the clothes and then my eye caught this darling diaper bag hanging on the end of a clearance rack. I've been looking for a nice diaper bag that's not too expensive but still attractive, so I checked it out. The original price was $40, which isn't bad, but it was marked down to $9.99. Then I saw that it had been marked down further to $7.99! I asked the salesgirl if it was really $7.99 and she said that it was actually the lowest price plus an additional 20% off! That really got my attention, so I took it right over and had her ring me up. Apparently, I missed the tag that said $4.99, because when she said "That'll be $4.01" I almost swallowed my tongue!! Isn't retail therapy fun?

The rest of the day/evening was spent curled up on the couch with the dog and a book or two. I started The Kite Runner after hearing good things about it and so far, I like it. I should be finished with it this evening if someone wants to discuss it :)

Everyone hold your hands up and scream...this is a roller coaster ride!! This time it's a boy, born Feb 2. Everything looks good, he was born full term and a nice average 7 lbs 8 oz. Mom is Chilean and dad is biracial. The only downsides are that mom prefers a Christian family (which we are not) and although mom's mom is on board, her dad and sister want her to parent. So everything sounds good except for those things...I'm cautiously excited...profiles go out on Friday.

Our counselor called while I was at the dentist...where it seems like I'm living these days...and she said that S decided that she didn't want to choose. In cases like that, the agency chooses the family who has been waiting the longest! What a cool way to do it! So even though we weren't this little one's mom and dad, someone will be picking up their heart's fondest desire tomorrow and taking their daughter home with them.

Ah well, c'est la vie! Perhaps next time...

Tomorrow is the day that our profile takes a little trip...I'm excited, but not too excited. We are up against two interracial couples, a black couple and a single black woman (that I know of...) and I don't know how far we'll make it on this one. Whatever happens though, there is a little girl who is going to make someone incredibly happy!

Some of my adoption friends are in the middle of having their dreams come true...my friend Em just brought her beautiful baby boy home yesterday, and my friend Dianne is in Ohio with her son, waiting for the interstate compact to go through so she can bring him home. My friend Li-Li is waiting for her new son to come home with them...it's positively raining boys lately! Maybe there should be a little girl in this mix...who knows!

Other than that, my birthday snuck up on me this year...I didn't realize that it was so soon, but it's this weekend! I'm going to be 33...older than Jeremy was when we met :) I am going to be the same age as my Gammy was when she had her second child...we have kids late in my family. I'll be the same age as Jesus was when he died! That's a sobering thought.

Anyway...in years past, I have had numerous ideas of what I want for my birthday (which Jeremy loves because he doesn't have to think too hard), but this year I can't think of a single thing that I want. I love jewelry of course, and I can usually find something that won't make Jeremy cringe at the price, but this year I am utterly stumped. I also love purses, but I just got a gorgeous bag for Christmas and I am not tired of carrying it around yet. Of course everyone knows what I really want, but even as resourceful as Jeremy is, he can't produce a baby out of thin air. So this year, he will surprise me :) I can't wait!!

We got a call...a baby girl, born 1-15. She was a little premature but in wonderful health - great APGARS, etc. No drug or alcohol exposure at all, mom is parenting 2 little girls already doesn't think she is able to parent another child. Her family is on board and very supportive. Our profile is going out on the 13th, Jeremy is in Germany from the 16th (my b-day LOL) through the 23rd. Could this be the most incredible belated birthday gift EVER for me?

I was talking about our adoption situation with my boss at the new temp job this morning, and she was saying that she would hire me in a second if I weren't going to be leaving anytime. I said, "Well there's nothing on the horizon, so I could be here for as long as you want me as of now!" My, things do change quickly around here, don't they!

Ok, enough with the damn snow already! It looks really pretty, but I am tired of driving in it. I talked to a guy in Hawaii today for work, and he said they're wearing shorts. I had to keep myself from swearing. Lucy is having trouble going out for her potty breaks since she is up past her armpits (legpits?) in the snow...it's gotta be hard to do the ol' squat n' pee when you can't squat. Jeremy is going to go out and mash the snow down when he gets home from work. Only the best for our little dog :)

We had some interesting news from a friend of ours who is going through another agency. She told me that their agency had 5 African American birthmoms who were in various stages of late pregnancy, and no people to adopt the babies. Since she knows we are interested, she told me to check out what we would need to get on their waiting parents list. She said that she didn't think it would be a big deal, maybe an extra thousand (which in the big scheme of things is no big) for program fees. It turned out to be a much bigger deal than either of us imagined. Basically, we would have had to take a few steps back and jump through a few hoops...something Jeremy and I have no desire to do.

The issue that makes me really angry is that the agency doesn't work with other agencies - if there is no one to adopt a child and the birthmom signs the Termination of Parental Rights (TPR), the baby goes into interim care...basically foster care through the agency. This could lead to attachment disorders for the baby, because it would have attached to the birthmom, then the foster family, and then would be expected to attach to adoptive parents. In a world where the rights of the child are supposed to be first and foremost and money is supposed to be last on the list, it sure seems like the opposite. It seems to me that if there are relinquished babies needing placements, and home study ready parents needing placements, that money and red tape shouldn't stand in the way of those babies and those parents becoming families. It sure angries up the blood!

Jeremy and I discussed it last night and decided that we would talk to our counselor and see if they know about this situation, and why the agencies don't work together...it would make me really sad if our agency (which has a stellar reputation in the adoption world) made use of the same practices.